Roar

I believe that to grow is to live. The effort to achieve growth, however, often demands hard work and sacrifice, and there are no guarantees for success. So, I have been asked, if there is a possibility to be happy without doing anything in the present moment, why should anybody work for growth. People argue that life is short and uncertain, and no matter what we do, ultimately most of us will die to be forgotten. They ask that even if we are remembered, does it make any difference. So, going by this logic, it seems that postponing today's happiness to tomorrow in hope of getting more does not look like the best bet. Indeed, if there are no guarantees and there is no happiness to be had either now or tomorrow, what is the point of working? Not much, from this point of view.

So I have learned that it is natural for any human being under the influence of this twisted logic to despair and not desire growth. The basic problem, however, with the argument presented above is that it assumes that the pursuit of growth is working for happiness in some abstract, flimsy moment in the future (this life, after life or other life: whatever one believes). That is not true.

I think growth takes place when one does what makes him happy and aligns it with personal learning. The day to day actions need to align themselves with happiness while keeping growth in perspective. But that can happen only when one is working towards what he thinks he would love doing.

This brings us to a fundamental question: what do we really want? Do we even want anything? Finding the answer would need self-introspection, experience, maturity and self-awareness. Over time, one learns to leave behind what one’s parents/society/siblings/wife/children/friends expect him to have, what one would like to show off to people so as he can feel successful, or even what one thinks is the "right" thing to do. Then, what one finds is what one would love to do.

This process of self-discovery, unfortunately, is seldom easy. It is not in the nature of human beings to generally seek answers to these questions unless they have had the good luck of having a realized spiritual Master in their lives or the bad luck of facing back-breaking adversities. A good place to start is to try to understand what one does NOT want and what one is NOT. Ultimately, self-awareness can be a powerful guiding force and can bring a lot of stability in life. Otherwise one is condemned to a lingering dissatisfaction with what one possesses AND with what does not possess, keeping one firmly attached to misery with a teasing promise of impending everlasting happiness (and they lived happily ever after?) that never really materializes.

If one despairs, it may help to remember that the essence of life is cyclic. A good event cannot exist without a bad one, and vice-versa. It is extremely hard, if not downright impossible, to control events. One cannot change the hand that nature deals, but one can decide how to play it. Cribbing and crying won't make things better: it will only waste time (the cribber’s and that of anybody who has to hear his cribbing) and will hinder progress in life. Strength is life, weakness is death. As a great saint said once, arise, awake and stop not till the goal is reached. Don't beg, don't crib. Demand for the highest! Don't bleat like a helpless sheep, stand up and roar...

For the crime of success

Recently, I have been reading a lot about the rising inequality in the US, its possible effects on the upcoming presidential elections, and even fears about the same happening in the UK.

I have two points to make.

Firstly, economic equality, as much as anybody may want it, is an ephemeral chimera that at best can cause frustration in the society and at worst lead to birth of a mediocre, self-annihilating socialist state. Even communists, with all the bloodshed and programs, were unable to achieve it. Are we really thinking of achieving it in an apparently capitalistic society? Nevertheless, we can (and should) aim for absolute equality before law and possible equality of opportunity for everybody, without fear or prejudice. That means making corporate lobbying and graft difficult. It also means making employment laws more meritocratic and employment process more transparent. It does not mean demonising the successful and ramming down their throat socialist taxes for the crime of being successful.

Secondly, it will be a mistake to make the current state of US economy a matter of class-warfare or a matter of punishing corporate America in the upcoming election. In the end, it is corporate America that will create jobs. Instead, the public of Unites States needs to do extensive soul-searching to understand what is blighting a great country. Is it really just greedy corporate? Easy answers are seldom right. If the country of democracy and free-enterprise is held hostage to things like corporate lobbying, excessive litigation, disintegrating social fabric, and a new-found worry about equality, something has gone wrong horribly somewhere down the line. Discouraging industry will only make it worse.

As unions and score of people cry out for good jobs and better pays, I am almost tempted to ask them to pluck it from the bush they think it grows on. Successful people make the jobs possible, demonising them is the worst possible thing that the society can possibly do to itself.

If not Capitalism, then what?

Going through the recent articles in the FT by Ken Costa and Martin Wolf got me thinking: if not Capitalism, then what? In fact, it has been quite some time that I have been reading anti-capitalist articles all over the media and it makes me wonder: how many protestors actually understand what they are protesting against?

If they are protesting against the current system, we are in a continent that has a strong welfare system, difficult employment rules, strong unions, high taxes, generous pensions, and subsidised access to education & health. This is not capitalism, just ways to live beyond our limited means. We live in a system that has increasingly made it difficult for entrepreneurship to prosper, as pointed out by Luke Johnson. A system of greed and entitlement, be it banks, governments, unions or the people, has led us to where we are.

If anything, I would argue we need more of Capitalism if there has to be prosperity. I would argue that in today's world China is more capitalistic than Europe, and the results are for everybody to see. At the same time it is undeniable that comprehensive regulations, fostering a culture of ethics and a well-aware population are necessary for free enterprise to flourish.

Finally, I would like to say that while free-market played its part, it is absurd to blame it for everything. If the West was living beyond its means, are businesses the only ones to blame? Perhaps not, but they do make a convenient target. The truth remains that, given all things equal, Democratic Capitalism produces more prosperity and equality than systems like Communism, Socialism, Monarchy, Theocracy or any other system that the protesters may know about. The big question is still this: if not Capitalism, then what? Reform, not revolution, is the way ahead.

Status Report

Sometimes I am amazed by the unpredictability and complexity of life. In this cacophony of thoughts and events it is so easy to loose track of the self, of how subtle existence is. How does one prevent oneself from complaining or being complacent? The divine libran balance seems ever elusive. As I live to understand the subtleties of my own mind and of this world, I experience at least some moments of genuine bewilderment. Other times, I am simply too tired or lost to care. Yes, I can reaffirm that the world is chaotic and , at least, apparently not fair. Equality is a bad joke and don't even get me started on fairness. Yet I must admit that there is simply too much that I don't understand. So I wait, I watch, and I play. Sometimes I do fear being consumed, decimated, and destroyed by my inquisitiveness: after all curiosity did kill the cat (or so they say). At these times I feel like going back to a safe refuge of mediocrity and dependability just for the relative respite it would bring. Unfortunately, I know that respite may be temporary and may turn into a suffocating, inescapable prison. And, then, it may not. At the same time the desire to be my own master and insanely rich keeps calling, even though I now realise that being "my own master" is more about an attitude, a deep confidence that can possibly emanate only from deep self realisation. But I ain't no saint, and I have no idea how near or far the doors of realisation lay at this point of time. So where does that leave us? Apparently on planet earth in a now familiar human habitation by name of Oxford. With an MBA and without a job, for now. Everything changes, I have heard and I hope. Here I stand: wiser, monetarily a shade poorer, humbler, and more knowledgeable than I have ever been before. And I look to move to the future with hope, determination and absolute focus. Yes, I am wary and tired, but I know with certainty that nothing except my own self- effort done from the sphere of awareness can possibly take me anywhere. Cheers!

Musings on Existence

In the realm of relativity everything is unreal and the search for absolute is the vain hope for a world devoid of change. Change is the only absolute in the mortal world; everything changes. And in this flux of everlasting, constant change I strive to define my life and the reasons behind it. I try to define the root of my happiness, sadness, worries, celebrations and all else in between. I try to find "me". I try to understand this creation. I don't find many definite answers, so I treasure the ones that I do find.

The subtle manifestations of cause and effect are undeniable. Yet, in the short-term life can be random. And in the long run? Well, as somebody said that in the long run we all will be dead. Perhaps there is an after-life, perhaps there is not. Perhaps God is the psychotic, vindictive, maniac people make him out to be. Perhaps he is simply a disinterested third-party observer watching his inferior experiments with disdain. I don't know. I don't know if there is a heaven or a hell, or if there is any meaning to life. I just know three things: I exist, I can think and I wish to excel.

Many philosophers deny existence, labelling what we see as an optical illusion conditioned by the mind. Having studied semantics, logic and cognition; I do have sympathy for some of their views and I can definitely see from where they are coming. Nevertheless, I think denying the entire existence is a shade too extreme. At most we can see ourselves as deluded or conditioned, from which one can escape by simply desiring to be free and by keeping an open mind.

Questions

Perhaps a man's lifespan is insignificant in the life of the universe. Perhaps he is puny and conveniently forgotten by Gods and Devils alike in one small corner of the galaxy. Perhaps he deliriously dreams of worlds beyond and lives in an inconsequential bubble of his own making, an illusion severely limited by his senses and knowledge. Perhaps.

In this random jungle unmistakeably governed by the rules of power and cause-effect, I live with what I have and strive to grow and learn. Beyond that I don't really see anything. I know that answers come to the one who is not in a hurry to either get them or drop them. So I wait and work with infinite patience, hoping someday I will completely understand the matrix of this world. I don't know if I will find the answers, but I know that I will never give up. My unshakable faith, spiritual Master and unyielding strength of mind are my only true allies. Hubristic Complacency, meaningless laziness and all-consuming despair are my only true enemies. In this game of uncertainty only change is certain.

I cannot live a meaningless existence, so I strive to create meaning from what I know. A meaning that can rationalize my efforts in face of imminent death and give me satisfaction right this moment. This moment is all I have, even though I am told I am forever. I just try to hold to what I can understand and use it to augment happiness and purpose in equal measure.

I also think if it is possible to be bound and yet free; like free-range cows left to roam the pastures but to be ultimately slaughtered to satiate somebody's hunger? Its fate is better than the cow confined to dirty pens for most of its miserable life and slaughtered anyway. The end, however, remains as grisly and unforgiving. A creature dependent on small mercies of its masters. Are we cattle too? Creatures enslaved for their limited productivity, creatures ready to live a second-hand existence out of fear, ignorance, helplessness or peer-pressure? I hope not..

Even if I have nothing, I still have the will, the hope and the spirit. With them I move and with them, I believe, one day I will find all the answers.

What I Like

Human desires can be as endless and as pointless as human existence itself. Bipolar human existence is tragically funny. Existence: a desire to live and be different. Or the helpless mingling with the worn out dust of time?

The endless search for an absolute that satisfies all queries and brings everlasting peace is a good excuse for the creation to continue. What is that we search for? Intellectual satisfaction of being able to articulate complex scientific or theological theories? Or the simple joy of being loved and being able to love? To borrow from umpteen sources to make one impressive debate or few original lines inspired by experience? To find meaning in public approval and the ability to control people or of an equanimity that stems from knowing the self?

I don't know. I have more questions than answers with me right now. More foolish desires than wisdom. One thing that I do know is that I crave for freedom and joy. Absolute freedom and joy. Freedom from age, life, death, money, myself, thoughts and even God. Freedom to drop every label. Joy of being loved and being able to love in return, of seeing the world and learning new skills, giving gifts to loved ones and of becoming an instrument of good. I don't find any joy in being selfless. I just like being true to my nature, whatever that may be.

The Evils of Righteousness

I feel that righteousness is the root of all fanaticism. Unflinching, self-sure, in your face cockiness proclaiming unabashedly: "I know!". Any doubt or question is met with derision, hostility, threats, violence, anger, hysteria and a host of other things except reason. Any attempt to talk reason is taken as an insult, heresy, conspiracy or foolishness. People who think that they have all the answers are the most stupid and dangerous ones. Unfortunately they are a plenty of them in today's world.

The chief and obvious candidates for the self-righteous are of course all the religious nuts. But it is not their sole-property. Anybody who thinks he knows all can qualify. It can be a communist, a Marxist, a leftist, a socialist, a Leninist, a fascist, a Nazi, a neo-Nazi, a rightist or a centrist too. Not just the established extreme thinkers. They can also be your free-thinkers, capitalists, atheists, human right groups et all. Without going too far from home, it can even be your parents, wife, husband, sibling, colleague, neighbor, boss or the society you live in too. Anybody who does not believe in "live and let live" and tries to impose his thinking on others is a good candidate. You can call this belief as my personal pillar of righteousness. And hell, I know! :D

Narrow and fixed sets of thinking cause conflict. Tolerance levels are falling, falling and falling all the time. What the heck,I think it is time I too develop my set of immutable set of beliefs. Who knows it may start a new religion :p. On the other hand, thank you very much. The people of the world (and I) already have enough problems to handle!

Where are we heading to, I wonder sometimes...

The Masterplan

There was a time that I used to believe. However as life went by I just found myself looking. Looking for answers. But what were the questions? Umm... A bit philosophical but important to me.. How does this world work? What is my purpose in this world? Why is this world in existence and where are we going? 

The more I have moved through this world, the more I have started seeing and believing in the dichotomous nature of the world. Relativity blurs the lines between good-bad, right-wrong, desirable-undesirable etc. In the end I don't find any ideological reason to do anything or believe anything. I just see a flux, an unpredictable flow determined by a few simple rules of thumb. I don't know if I should call them rules of power or rules of existence and I don't know how far I will be able to define them if I try to. To say, to write : to be interpreted into half truths that may come back to haunt me. I don't know. Nobody really does, I feel. Just moving along.

I have reconciled that everybody's lifestyle and belief system, including mine, are one of convenience. We act as per our nature, as per the basic grain of our personality. It may take advanced combinatorial mathematics and hardcore psychology but it is possible to predict how people can affect each other and their environment in term of possibilities. The system may look pretty anarchic to start with as a complicated criss-cross of events. What makes these systems even more complex is the fact that whenever an event occurs it invariably has the potential of triggering other events and can drastically change probability distribution of the entire system. People do try to predict events by building a probability matrix around a reported event. However the very probability of any future event is not a simple function of one event though it is possible for a lot of events to point in one direction.

The world of probability is a world of possibility. According to this theory prophets are simply people smart and common-sensical enough to see the world matrix distribution and connect dots well. Experts are people who can do it for a particular field. Consultants and entrepreneurs are people who can apply it to daily life. At the end of day this ability can play a significant role in the rise of the person as a formidable power. Will it? Nobody knows. This is the beauty (or tragedy if you like) of complex probabilistic systems: nothing is impossible, conditions applied. 

At the corporate level this is used to some extent in form of adaptive planning. In technology Spring seems to come from a similar mind set. Wherever I see beauty, progress, power, apparent control; I can relate it with this theory which reasonably explains the working of the world to me and answers how. My purpose is constant all-round improvement, having fun, living life as I please, taking care of my family and if I have resources help fellow human beings. My inspiration is H.H. Sri Sri Ravi Shankar. My source of energy is meditation, eccentricity, love and praying. Why and where are something that I hope to find out as I master the How and What. Clear cut plan for me so far. Lets see where it leads to!

Lessons From Death

What can death teach us I wonder today.

I really dont know but I can try to think and share. I think the knowledge, awareness and acceptance of death can either make one depressed and fearful or more alive. Depressed and fearful are easy to comprehend but more alive?

If we knew that we had all but a few days to live, I think it would really affect the way we live. The things we value, the things we speak and the things we do would change. First, greed will not make sense as you will know nothing is going with you. Next you will be nicer for fear of God or you would want people to have a good last memory of you. Then you would like to express all that you can to all those you couldnt.. To say those extra love yous and be with the ones you want to.. You would not care what the world thinks of you as what the hell, life is almost over. You'd want to do what you had post-poned all along if you still have the time. You would love more, be a better human being and live every second possible.. That is if you dont waste what you have in fear and self-pity.. Knowledge of death brings humility for you know how easy it is for the show to be stopped at the slightest whim of the director (Mr. God).

So, I live everyday as if it may be my last. That if today God comes and says "Time up Sunny boy" I dont have to think twice before moving on.. with no regrets that I did not do my best... Any moment can be your last..

In this vast cosmos millions of years old I am not even a speck of dust, either in size or in time of my life.. With each moment that passes life is ebbing away.. So I do some good, love my people passionately, do what I can today and smile.. Improves the quality of my life and my soul..

You can learn from anybody. Even death.

Good and Bad?

Was just thinking..What is a "good" person? What is "goodness"? What is a "person of strong character"? Conversely, what is a "bad" person? What defines a "person of weak character". Here's my view...

Before I talk about a good person, I need to define goodness. According to me goodness is a relative term and its definition varies from one person to other according to age, experience and location. Nevertheless in its most general characteristics practical goodness may be defined as an act that benefits people in some way. The people benefited may include the person engaged in the action. However the person's profit should not exceed that of the group and he should not be the only person in profit. Any person who can judge effectively such acts for a particular society and does them is a good person for that society. A person defined as good in majority of the societies is a good person.

Talking about character, according to me it is the iron in the person. A person perfect in action, word and mind (the most important) is a person of strong character. I think character is not only what you do when people are looking at you but also what you do when people are not looking at you OR when people don't matter to you. But it has nothing to do with good or bad.

Defining bad is easy now. Badness or evil is an act that harms or hurts anybody. Any person who engages in such an act deliberately is bad.

A person of weak character is one who is what he is because he has to be, not because he wants to. They don't have courage to either be evil or good and hence die hanging in between. Of course all people don't lie on the extremes and hang or oscillate between good/bad/strong/weak. A person of strong character may be good or evil.

This is my opinion.

What is your definition of a "good" person? How do you define a "person of strong character"? What is "goodness" for you? Conversely, what is a "bad" person? Define a "person of weak character" and tell me about your understanding of "evil" or "badness". And then, tell me how you see yourself in the mirror of truth and what makes you think so? Why? If no, how do you judge people? (Don’t give me that crap that you don’t "judge"!). Do we manipulate our definitions to put ourselves with the so called goodies/ not look at our "bad" side? Or do we accept ourselves for what we are without any regrets?

And I Write...

Movement is life. We move from one point to another. Sometimes with an aim and sometimes(eh..) aimlessly. Moving because we want to or because there is no choice. The essence of movement is action. No action can be perfect. Yet perfection is the aim of many if not all. Aim as in theory. Realistically and practically it is love and its permutations that drive the mind and the self to movement. Movement as we know it and as we don't know it..

In my words you may have seen or felt the stress on complements. The twin complements which form the heavenly libran balance, the driver and the driven, want and aversion, love and hate, God and Devil... I see them as the whip of the taskmaster we call life. They get the job done. But what exactly is this "job" is difficult to write for me.

And yes, then there is this life. The life that does not have any certainities, no single and final "truth" as we know it/want it. In the end it is all but a matter of perspective and the want within. The hollow, meaningless, haunting, unfathomable rage the soul feels from time to time due to an incompleteness it cannot comprehend. Pointless! The writing, the thinking; the living... Self-preservation, relativity, laziness and directionlessness are the words that cross the mind. The mind, of course, registers them as old-old words: overused, misused, abused, repeated... And so it goes with the questions that shall remain, I now understand. Here enters the silence (clap-clap-clap!) I try to break with these mute words of mine. As they break free from my pen (figuratively, of course!), I look at them hoping they are not the ghosts I left on some other paper or the ones I read somewhere.. Hoping they will find an end for themselves so as I can go on with a work to occupy the thought that is not there. Yet.

I close my eyes and try to let go of the labels I hold on to. And I write for the pain that nobody would know and the eternity that awaits... For the joy. For love and peace..

A Bad Day

I have never felt at home on this strange planet that I have been sent to. But since I have been sent here, I must deserve to be here. But God, I don't understand... And (as usual) I think..

days will pass, nights will go
years will pass, years shall show
love will fade, friends will vanish
doubt will creep, trust shall tarnish
eternity and I are friends, I know
"happiness is a state of mind"
and so is everything else
generalizations are cheap and easy
yet they work and are convenient
everything is a matter of convenience
and profit
..and courage
courage is a relative term
everything is relative, huh?
life is the search for the absolute
the absolute is me
where?
being human is tough
being an animal is easy
I don't want to live in tomorrow
I want what I can have today
Life will take its own course
In the end they will tell me it was planned and destined
then they will ask me what I learned..
if I feel like I do right now, I may say f$%k u
and they will send me again down to another hell
because I "deserve" it?
the chains are real. What is real?The pain is..

At times like these I find happiness in falling because there is nothing I feel to rise for or rise to. Selfishness, the inseparable basic animal instinct can permutate to take form of good or/and bad deeds. Love becomes the instrument of fate. Destiny awaits. I am human and I have my weaknesses. I learn slow and steady what I don't understand. My eyes don't tell me if it is night or day. My skin feels no snow or sun. But I do suffer for reasons I never know or comprehend. Somewhere caught in the cob-webs of my sentiments and ego is my happiness. Want to break free of everything, want to feel only peace. Can you hear me...

A Memory

A memory is an impression on the mind. The mind, stuck with its human “loneliness“. Stuck with itself...

A memory is past. It is “the splinter in my mind“.

For me memory is also a word. And that word is you... The cold lonely plains of eternity manifest themselves on the pallid, barren plains of gloominess. The cold winter persists awaiting the promise of spring. Delayed may be but nevertheless inevitable... And then the summer, autumn...and then the winter again... The cyclic manifestations of joy and sorrow? There is something I remember. And you? What do you feel? What perturbs you? What doesn't? So, life is a breeze? Life is nothing..or is it.... Get out of my mind. Now. Or manifest as you should...

May be if I could just be, I could have all I ever wanted. be-have?

Memory, the moments that flash across my eyes to haunt or delight... There are faces I see but it is difficult to listen to what they say. I know the words but I can't hear them. Could never hear them. Can you hear me? What do I say... Even you will become a memory. And me? I will re-invent you to nurture my lonely,delirious dreams. Would you know? Would you care? Will I?

So just hold on to what's there and move...we will find the way... I hope..

Pain

Pain: an unpleasant sensation occurring in varying degrees of severity as a consequence of injury, disease, or emotional disorder says the dictionary. My focus, I guess, is on the emotional side.

There is a pain we live with. A pain that promises to go away easily but does not. Living in pain is not a voluntary decision. It is like a severe attack of migraine. The one suffering cries, shouts and even bangs his head: often hurting himself and the people around. Yet the pain simply won't go. At that time the only thing that seems real is pain. “What is real” if Morpheus asked me, the pain is, I would say...

My take on it? What do I say... To say, to be heard and interpreted... Like always, I risk it for what the hell! I personally feel that a little awareness, magnanimity and strength can cure pain. For some time at least. The pain will return in the same or a different form because there is so much to learn... Changes will come but perhaps one life time will be too short to eliminate pain. Key words are persist, respect, wait, love, balance, play. Persist with effort, respect time, wait for your chance, love yourself(very important) and everybody and everything you can, balance whatever you learn for it may just be one of many faces of truth, play for life is short and no one knows for sure what after that...

Nothing touches the peace in the core once it is manifested. So they say...

So it goes.

The Gift to See

I feel people often delude themselves about the truth of things. But how does one “see” truth, as they say? The Sufis (and many other saints/philosophers) believed that one has to prove oneself worthy of truth and the truth surfaces. They were talking about God but I feel it holds true even for our day-to-day life. The first and only condition to achieve this, I feel, is silence. Not outside but inside. I have experienced that when I meditate and get some respectable silence in the mind, things seem much clearer. Only in silence I can let go of things and see them for what they are (like Jack Welsch writes “stop kidding! things are as they are!”). A possible reason may be that only in silence the chaos comes down and one is able to see. A zen master once told his disciple that one cannot desire the truth for truth comes from desirelessness.

I may add that in the end even truth is a point of view in the world. That is if you decide to look at things...

Moving Along

In retrospect the past feels like a dream. A feeling that I am either falling or flying. Things happened in strange funny ways while I was bombarded with cliches and questions alike..

“Whatever it is, do it 100% and you will be happy!” Great! You don't look like either a 100% guy or a happy one. Good advice anyway!

“Find out your dream, what you really-really want to do! You will be happy!” The Alchemist fever... What dream? These psychosomatic influences and beliefs that rise from the conditioning the society gives us? Pllleaassse!

I learnt the hard way that people can be selfish and short-sighted (or, pleasantly, the opposite). The ability to philosophize exceeds the one to execute in most (bureaucracy of the mind!). As life gets more complex and the bellies are full, more demands enter the mind of many. Talk about dreams to a guy living in poverty and he may think you are crazy (that makes the majority of the world...sad but true). Ever been near death? Would clear your head so much that you would question the way you live. And if you have survived to read this (like I did to write), you may as well agree that in the end nothing really matters except the few good moments and the happiness today. If God asked you, “Dude! Your time is up. Let's go!”, could you just stand up and walk without any regret? Right now?

Saints call life a play of divine. And we are the Gods who play? Seems like we are being played with but what the hell! Who knows? So I guess just let be, let go. Relax with yourself and you may just meet your soul. Soulmate? Dunno about that piece of story. Another thing I feel is that one has to also learn to give without fear (and learn when not to give without fear!). I think it is important both for growth and strength. Learning more as I live each day. And so it goes..

The Way of Orion

Time moves as it must. The imperceptible change becomes perceptible when it stares right down at your face. Life seems like a big-big game. To be happy you need to be game. And you have to remember that happiness is today, now.

The basic problem is thinking. The same thinking that gets one involved/affected by most trivial of things can also be revealing and helpful at times. Some people believe thinking can be channelized. Channelize? Where? The flux of thoughts never ceases. Thoughts come and go off their own sweet will and time. However, to be affected or not is a choice. I guess one can try to think, learn and move. Movement is the key or you are stuck.

Another enemy is feelings as I know them. Feelings change. If there is anything certain about feelings, it is change. Everybody,in essence, wants to feel happy. Yet more often than not this very desire for happiness kills our happiness. This usually happen when we become so obsessed with our feelings that we forget that others have feelings too.

Will write more some other day. Ending with a small couplet I once wrote...


When I feel I write a word
A one, a two, a three and four
More, more; words more
To add to list, to get a gist
Incomplete, meaningless
Misleading and sad
Words...